Everyone aspires to be regarded as high-value. Why?
We all want to be respected and admired, and it’s no wonder why. But not everyone can do what it takes to be high-value.
Being a high-value woman often entails doing what’s unconventional. It means you behave maturely and more put together than the average woman out there. It also entails independence and self-reliance.
But as with every difficult thing in life, it has its rewards.
High-value women are highly respected by men and looked up to by other women. They also attract quality men who appreciate and value them.
The good news is that any woman can learn to be high-value. Here’s how to do it.
1. How to be a woman a man needs
Most ladies are low value because they keep expecting a man to complete them.
You can spot them by how ready they are to jump into the next relationship. Whenever they are single, they feel incomplete and empty. They always want eyes on themselves, someone to tell them they are beautiful and adorable all the time.
This isn’t to say that it’s a bad thing to like complements or to want to be around others. However, if you want to be a high-value woman, you must have a life that you love.
You need to get busy, doing meaningful things and having an impact on the world around you. Your positive influence needs to overflow and impact those around you. That’s how you become a high value.
Don’t sit around waiting for a man to complete you. Go out and live your life fully. Be a woman a man needs.
2. Know your self-worth
People with high self-esteem know that they are worthy and lovable. They don’t need a guy to remind them of this every single day to feel good about themselves.
When you’re insecure, you need constant validation. If you’re in a relationship, you are constantly going to feel resentful of your partner for not giving all his attention to you. And you’ll blame him for not making you feel attractive.
But here’s the hard truth. It’s not his job to make you feel good. Of course, you want your partner to compliment you and be affectionate, and that’s fine.
But you can’t rely on him entirely to make you feel good about yourself. It also has to come from within. And if you don’t already feel good about yourself, then nothing he says is ever truly gonna sink in.
You’re just going to need more and more of that fix because you don’t truly believe that about yourself.
The fact is, if you don’t truly believe you’re worthy of love, you will never believe that someone else can love you, so you will never fully trust any of the things he says, and that just does not make for a healthy dynamic in a relationship.
3. The mindset of a high-value woman
Look, the odds are against you, and that’s understandable.
Day in and day out we are all bombarded with perfect pictures from celebrities, Instagram models, Hollywood, and hip hop videos. It’s hard to love yourself as you are nowadays. But you have to fight this downward pull.
If you’re constantly putting yourself down, saying “I’m worthless, I don’t look good enough, I’m pathetic. I’m never going to find a guy, I’m going to end up alone. Nothing ever works out for me,” watch that sort of language.
As soon as it pops into your head, replace it. Why? Even if it’s not your reality, if you tell yourself enough times, you will retrain your mind to think about yourself and see yourself that way.
Watch the way you talk to yourself. Notice the language and replace it with positive language and make the decision that you are a woman of high self-value.
4. Make yourself stand out from low-value women
One of the biggest distinguishing features between women of high self-worth and women who have low self-worth is boundaries.
Women with high self-worth have boundaries, and they stick to them. And this is why they don’t get taken advantage of.
How do you do this? Prioritize yourself and your emotions. Don’t put up with a treatment that you objectively know is unacceptable. Do not accept when you know it isn’t the way that you deserve to be treated.
Competent people don’t abandon parts of themselves just to make a relationship work. They bring their whole selves into the relationship, and if it doesn’t work out or if the guy can’t truly appreciate them for who they are, they have no problem leaving.
They know that they will find someone better, and they will find someone who truly does appreciate them for who they are.
High-value women have standards, and they don’t accept anything that is beneath those standards. If she doesn’t want to be a middle-of-the-night booty call, she will not accept middle-of-the-night booty calls.
When you have low self-esteem, you put up with poor treatment. Your main concern is just getting the other person like you because you have no solid sense of self to fall back on.
Hence, his approval means everything to you, and that’s why you allow him to get away with so much bad behavior. You’re just afraid to walk away because you need him, you need him to fill your self-esteem.
5. Don’t chase relationships
Women of high value do not obsess endlessly over their relationships.
They focus on building a life of their own. Why?
People with high self-esteem believe they are worthy of love, and they don’t question how someone else feels about them. They know that they’re lovable. And if a guy, for some reason, decides that he doesn’t want to be with her, it doesn’t bring down her self-worth.
She realizes that it’s okay, that this relationship just wasn’t right, and that’s it. There’s nothing personal about it.
Women of high value do not attach their sense of self to how a man feels about them, and as a result, they are not overly apprehensive about a man’s opinion of them.
6. Be patient with the journey
We all have flaws. All of us have parts of ourselves that we wish we could refine, and that’s okay.
The journey of self-discovery is an ever-evolving process. It is a lifelong journey that must be carried out with patience. But there’s just one rule. Don’t reject yourself while trying to improve.
Your scars are just as a part of you as your brightest parts. Don’t feel depressed because there’s a part of you that’s still growing. Don’t compare your highlight reels with another person’s behind the scenes.
Be patient with yourself while trying to attain your ideal. This is the right order. Like a baby, nurture your better self to life.
7. Demonstrate high-value
If you want to be a woman of high value, you need to do valuable things.
Practice being compassionate and kind. Get involved with causes that are important and do things that are meaningful to you. Little, seemingly inconsequential things like these build up your sense of self and make your life more meaningful.
8. Do this simple exercise often
Ask yourself how a competent woman will react in the situation you’re in.
For instance, if you find yourself obsessing over a guy, ask yourself, “If a guy doesn’t text a competent woman back for a few hours, will she completely fall apart?
“Will she be analyzing all of his texting and looking for what she did wrong? Will she think he’s not texting back because she used too many emojis? Probably not.
A competent woman would say, “he’s probably just busy. I’ll hear from him later.”
Will a competent woman accept a man who just disappears for weeks and then reappears and wants to see her but then disappears again? No, she would realize his actions are unacceptable.
Would a competent woman stay in a relationship with a guy who says “I don’t want to be in a relationship right now” when she wants a relationship? No, she wouldn’t.
9. Don’t brag about your value
It is such a turnoff to try and prove yourself to someone else. It’s also a huge turn-off when you just talk and talk and talk and talk, just trying to prove how amazing you are.
This is something that only people with low self-esteem do. Women of high value don’t need to tell you how valuable they are. A high-value man knows when he is in the presence of a confident high-value woman, so don’t try to prove yourself to him.
Don’t talk about how many guys hit on you or how many dates you have lined up on Tinder. Let him discover you slowly.
Being a woman who reveals herself, gradually, carefully peeling back the layers one at a time is much more intriguing and appealing than a woman who just lays it all out there and puts on a whole song and dance about how amazing she is to win this guy over.
10. Take care of your looks
This is the only superficial thing on this entire list. The rest of it all comes down to you and your life and how you behave.
When you look good, you feel good.
This does not mean you try to look like someone else. It means you find makeup techniques that enhance your best features. Style your hair in a way that flatters your face.
You wear clothing that flatters your body type and you make your body look the best that it can look. You don’t try to get someone else’s body. You work with what you have.
You don’t try to wish a good body on yourself. You exercise and do the work that gets you that killer shape, not because you’re insecure, but because you want to be the best you can be.
Being a high-value woman will not happen overnight. Some of the best women out there have gone through the worst situations. They’ve made a lot of mistakes, and that’s why they are who they are today.
So if you’re still early in your journey, don’t beat yourself up too much. Take it one step at a time. Don’t let your past mistakes haunt you. Instead, use them to grow and increase your value.