Some guys don’t know what makes women tick either because they don’t have a good relationship with women or because they don’t spend some time observing them. 

The thing is, women and men think differently on many grounds. And if you’re too self-absorbed as a guy, thinking the same things that will impress you will impress a girl, you’re going to get disappointed a lot with women. 

Most of the things that turn a woman on are surprising and counterintuitive to most men. And in this article, we’re going to be discussing 10 of them. 


1. Vulnerability 

Most guys believe they have to be tough all the time. Men are taught very early on to not show too much emotion. And for this reason, most men learn to not show any form of vulnerability around women. 

But the truth is that vulnerability can make a woman feel more connected to you. 

Think about it. Showing a woman that you can be vulnerable around her tells her that she’s special to you. It means you trust her, and she can trust you to be transparent with her anytime. 

For instance, some men will still like to show dominance even when they are at fault. But a man who willingly opens up and simply admits his wrongs, though is vulnerable at that moment, will only melt his woman’s heart with his honesty and emotional maturity. 

As much as it is good for a man to be dominant and masculine, showing vulnerability once in a while can make your woman feel that special bond with you. 


Interesting: 10 Subtle Signs She’s Developing Feelings For You


2. Being nice to others 

Kind people are charming. 

You’ve probably heard the idea that if you want to get a good understanding of someone’s true nature, watch how they treat those who are in a lesser position, like service staff, waiters, etc. 

Everyone responds well to kindness. We all want someone who has a good heart, who is caring and empathetic. 

A man who treats others with kindness and respect shows his woman that he isn’t just nice to her because she’s pretty or because he wants something from her. It’s his nature, and she can count on him to be that to her anytime any day. 

And this assurance will make her feel safe with him. 

3. Knowing how to make her crave you 

Keeping the romance in a relationship is hard work. Most people just go with the flow and gradually let a natural decay slowly kill the relationship. 

This is why it takes a deliberate effort to make a relationship work. And when a man knows what to do to keep the romance alive, it blows a woman’s mind away. 

Men who understand this know the value of space. They know that it’s not just about giving the woman their attention all the time. They understand that as much as attention is good, it’s also good to go away, and let the mind want what it already has. 

This is perhaps why Esther Perel, a relationship therapist put it that desire needs space. Those who don’t understand this simple concept end up with a passion that only lasts as long as their hormones can remain fired up. 


Also read: How To Tell A Girl That You Like Her


4. Eye contact 

Scientifically, it’s been found that making eye contact with someone we love makes us feel good. 

And this is because when two people who are attracted to each other mutually gaze into each other’s eyes, the brain releases oxytocin, which in turn makes the two people looking at each other bond more. 

Furthermore, a man who always makes good eye contact with his woman makes her feel special. When he’s looking at her, it’s evident that he’s paying attention. It means he respects her, and whatever she has to say is deserving of his undivided attention. 

5. Deep voice 

Most women are turned on by a deep baritone voice. And this is partly because we all want what we don’t or can’t have. Women typically have soft and mild voices. And hearing a man who has a strong, deep voice just feels good. 

6. Being good with your hands 

You don’t need to be an A-class mechanic, plumber, or electrician. But if you happen to have any of these skills, then it’s an added advantage to you. 

The point is that ladies like men who know how to fix things. And the reason is simple. For a woman, watching a man fix something that is broken is like watching a magician perform his tricks. 

And one of the reasons for this is that fixing things is not a skill most women are interested in. This is partly why women dominate careers like nursing while men dominate engineering or architecture. 

Hence, seeing a man do his thing, fixing broken stuff, as simple as it might seem to most men, is just an amazing sight for most women. 

7. Intelligence 

Studies show that intelligence is one of the major things women look at when choosing a romantic partner. 

And one of the reasons women find intelligence attractive, as many women have confessed, is how intelligence manifests in a man. 

For instance, if you’re in a conversation (or an argument) with an intelligent man, he’s able to show you how independent his mind is. Instead of just agreeing with everything the woman says, he’s going to present unique perspectives that are going to make the women look at the world differently. 

And this isn’t something most women come across every day. 

Furthermore, intelligent men are just more self-aware. They can handle conversations better and handle themselves properly. Women find all these charming. 


Interesting: 9 Core Male Traits Women Find Irresistible


8. Having a skill 

In her research which she did across several countries, the relationship therapist Esther Perel found that most couples confessed that they found their partners most attractive when they were in their element. 

Meaning when their partner is on stage playing the piano, singing, acting, dancing, etc, they find them most attractive at that moment. This is the power of having a skill. 

Apart from the fact that being good at a skill is a sign of intelligence, it also makes you admired by many. And as Robert Greene wrote in The Art of Seduction, 

“Desire is both imitative (we like what others like) and competitive (we want to take from others what they have). 

9. Collectiveness 

A man that is calm and put together has a unique aura. It’s no wonder why fictional characters like James Bond are portrayed as calm and collected people. 

A calm man is the opposite of an anxious and needy man. He has mastered himself. A woman can feel safe with him because he has a demeanor that makes you feel like nothing can go wrong with him. 

He gives you the impression that he’s a man who can handle himself. When he’s in a conversation with a woman, he sits with his shoulders back, looking at the woman straight in the eye. 

And since we pick up the dominant energy in social interactions, women also feel calm and relaxed around him, making them enjoy his company. 

10. Being a good conversationalist 

How well you’re able to hold a conversation with people will determine to a large extent how they see you. 

Now, this isn’t about being an extroverted man who finds pleasure in going out and talking to people. Being able to hold a decent conversation goes beyond just being outgoing. 

Sometimes the loud ones are the most annoying. 

Rather, it has to do with empathy, selflessness, calmness, and a genuine interest in people. Anyone who has these, introvert or not, will be a good conversationalist. 

Even if the person doesn’t talk to you for a long time, the short moment you share will be worth it. It will be natural, memorable, and enjoyable. 


Conclusion 

As the saying goes, your looks might capture people’s attention, but it’s your character that will keep them interested. Nothing on this list has to do with looks. Meaning, they are all learnable if you’re not implementing them already. 

Remember that the kind of relationship you have with someone depends largely on how well you understand that person. 

Stop seeing the things your woman will like with the eyes of a man. Observe her and learn. As Robert Greene put it in The Art of Seduction, 

“Men do not understand how women think, and vice versa; each tries to make the other act more like a member of their own sex.”


Also read: Why Girls Like Bad Boys, According to Psychologists


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