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Asking a girl to be your girlfriend can be daunting, even for naturally confident people. There is something about expressing feelings that can quickly get you tongue-tied.

Whether you are a newbie or have been in the dating game for a while, sometimes the same nerves plague you. You go over everything that could go wrong repeatedly in your mind until you have lost hope of ever being with the girl you like.

Chin, up. Here are some great tips on how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend.


1. The trick that makes you stand out

This is probably the most overlooked step in asking a girl to be your girlfriend. 

The Cambridge dictionary defines being confident as “being certain of your abilities”. This implies that to successfully ask a girl to be your girlfriend, you need to believe in your ability to ask, and I daresay not only ask but also be the most exceptional boyfriend. 

One thing that happens when you have this certainty in your abilities is that you become mentally assured, and your attitude gains a boost. This isn’t about arrogance or boasting.

It’s about seeing yourself as a high-value man who has something to bring to the table.

You don’t chase, nor are you apprehensive about the answer she will give you. You’re just a great guy looking for a good lady to share an experience with. 

Simple things like dressing well, living a life you’re proud of, etc., can increase your confidence.


Read: 10 Signs She Is Sexually Attracted to You


2. The importance of timing 

Most of us have been in situations where we said something too soon, too late, or in the most awkward circumstances. Timing can determine the outcome of your request when you ask a girl to be your girlfriend. 

If the girl you like is someone you already have a connection with, you may have an idea of when would be the best time to have this conversation with her. That being said, you may need to create the moment. 

Strike a casual conversation with her, create the right atmosphere and let her response lead you to your following action. Studies show that broaching this topic with them after two months of knowing a person is acceptable. 

In addition to this, be guided by the girl’s response to your previous interactions. If she has not been receptive or has barely cracked a smile in your presence, you might need to wait longer.

3. Plan how you will say it

This is where the real action comes in. Times are changing, and there are many ways to ask a girl to be your girlfriend than saying it in person or saying the words just as it is.

You may want to keep it simple and go that route; that is no problem.

You may also want to be creative in the way you ask. 

Are you excellent at composing poetry or music? That could be an incredible way to say it.

Although it may be acceptable to ask a girl over text message, it may be more romantic and meaningful to both of you if you look her in the eyes, face to face, and say what is on your heart or sing it. 

A 2021 statistic shows that 93 percent of women prefer to be asked out by a man. This means that you will be the one doing the asking several times in your life. It will be helpful to have different fun ways to say it.


Related: How To Tell A Girl That You Like Her 


5. How to be natural and get accepted

Because you want to impress the girl, you might be tempted to rehearse every step and every word.

Practicing what you will say is not a bad idea, especially if you are nervous. However, you also want to just be natural. 

If this girl already knows you, she knows how you act and speak.

She also probably knows you do not speak complex English with incomprehensible words, nor do you own an expensive watch or car. 

So drop the act; pretense may get you rejected faster than you imagine. 

Be your best self. Authenticity will take you a long way. Do you wonder why sometimes the nerd gets the most beautiful girls? They are not focused on the wrong things and trying to be anything other than their nerdy selves.

5. Pop the question, be direct

When it is time to ask her the question, be direct. Some guys like to refer to fun things commonly understood between them and the girl.  

For instance, if you are Grey’s Anatomy fans, it is acceptable to say something like, “will you be my Meredith Grey, and I’ll be your Derrick Sheperd”. 

No matter how fun you want to put it, you have to emphasize by being direct, “Will you be my girlfriend”?. You do not want to miscommunicate what you are asking. Meredith and Derrick got married, but marriage is not what you are asking for, at least not yet. 

Being direct shows your confidence. It helps make things easy and straightforward. Once she starts getting confused about your intentions, you might lose her. 


Interesting: How to Get A Girl to Kiss You Without Asking


6. Give her time 

Once you shoot your shot, all you can do is give the girl time to decide what she wants to say to you. If you have been friends and have gone on a couple of dates, she may respond immediately.

If she barely knows you or feels like your question was unexpected, she may take a few hours or days to give you an answer. All you can do is wait and give her the space to decide.

The last thing you want to do is pressure her or become clingy because you’re desperate for an answer. No girl wants to be with a clingy guy. Pressuring will only lead to you getting rejected. 

7. Respect her decision

Although you may prepare well and follow all the tips correctly, your effort may not always be rewarded with a ‘yes’.

If she says no, you have to accept her reasons for saying no, which can give you an idea of what you could have done better. 

On the other hand, it may not be about you at all. The girl may just not like you to the extent that you like her, which is okay.

On the bright side, this experience has given you the chance to practice for the next girl you want to ask to be your girlfriend. Never take rejections personally. 


Final words

Physical strength plays a huge role in whether a male can find a mate in the animal kingdom. For us humans, this is not the case. 

Physical strength does not determine who gets the girl. Everyone has a fair chance as long as you know the rules of the game and you put your best foot forward.


Also read: 15 Cute Things to Say to Your Crush


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Destiny Femi

Destiny Femi is a dating coach whose work has helped transform the love lives of countless people. With a writing style that is both insightful and relatable, Destiny has amassed a following of hundreds of thousands of readers who turn to him for advice on everything from finding the perfect partner to maintaining a healthy relationship. Through his articles he has inspired people around the world to become more confident, authentic, and successful in their dating life.

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