Attraction Diary

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“Charisma is a perfect blend of warmth and confidence.” — Vanessa Van Edwards, human behavior expert

The term “charisma” comes from the Greek word “charizesthai” which means “gift of grace.” And according to studies, charismatic people are more likely to be successful in leadership positions majorly because they tend to be good at influencing or persuading others.

That said, if you’re not naturally charismatic, here are 25 little things you start implementing to master the art. 

1. Be present in the moment 

The first step towards being more charismatic is being present in the moment — both physically and mentally — as much as possible. 

Being present means being aware of your surroundings, listening attentively when others are speaking to you, focusing on their words rather than your own thoughts or distractions, and responding to them authentically.

2. Speak authentically 

Speaking authentically means speaking in a way that is genuine, not worrying about what anyone else thinks, and sharing your own truth. 

Doing this will help you to have more natural conversations with others because you will be easier for them to connect with.

3. Be curious 

It can be hard for us to shift our focus from ourselves and the things we worry about, but being curious about other people’s lives can make all the difference, as it allows you to understand and empathize with them. 

By listening to others, you can learn more about their lives and the things that matter to them.  

4. Be comfortable with silence 

Sometimes it’s silence that creates the most interesting moments. People are often afraid to be silent because they feel like it will make them look bad, but silence can be very powerful in building connections with others.

5. Be physically present 

More charismatic people tend to have more presence in their body language. 

If you’re meeting a group of people for the first time, try to stand up straight and take up as much space as possible. Other physical cues you can use are eye contact, hand gestures, and nodding while listening.

6. Be mindful 

Introducing mindfulness in your life can help you to have a better understanding of how other people think and feel. This can increase your ability to make connections with others because it helps you to see the world from their perspective.

6. Be assertive 

When someone is assertive with their words, they are taking responsibility for their own actions and speaking up for themselves rather than waiting for someone else to do it. 

The best way to practice assertiveness is by giving people “no” when they ask you to do something you don’t want and then following through on your decisions.

8. Be resourceful 

People who are more charismatic tend to have a greater abundance of resources in their life. 

This could include everything from money, connections, skills, or intelligence. By working towards obtaining more resources you increase your ability to captivate people.

9. Be honest

People who are more charismatic tend to have the courage and strength to be completely authentic and open with others, even when it’s difficult. 

This helps them remain easy to trust due to their integrity and authenticity. Being honest is one of the most important qualities in any relationship.

10. Have high standards 

More charismatic people often have a set of high personal standards. This could be in terms of how much they value their family, or how hard they work for their job. No matter what the situation, people with higher standards can stay committed to them even when no one is looking.

11. Be good at taking time off 

Taking time off from work or social obligations is an important part of maintaining mental and physical health. People who are more charismatic often know how important it is to take time for themselves. 

This has a way of making them more respected, firstly because of their absence. And secondly, because of the composure and self-mastery that comes with taking time for yourself.  

12. Good listening skills 

Being able to listen well is an important skill in any relationship, especially romantic ones. 

People with great listening skills want to understand what makes their partner happy or sad, they want to show them they’re valued and listened to, and they make sure the conversation feels safe. 

13. Handle criticisms like a pro

In relationships, it’s not unusual for one partner to criticize the other — but being able to handle that kind of feedback is important. People who are more charismatic are confident enough in their abilities and have a good sense of self that they’re not too bothered by criticism from others.

14. Have strong opinions 

Charismatic people have strong opinions and beliefs about what matters most in life — their family, community, faith, or work. They don’t shy away from making a stand, and they aren’t afraid to take the lead. They also don’t waste time on small talk.

15. Be able to turn down social invitations politely 

Having a full plate of work and family duties is one thing — but being busy is not an excuse for turning down all invitations from friends or family members. People with charisma know when it’s time to say no and can avoid people who appear to be overstaying their welcome.

16. Be patient 

When people have patience, they’re able to regulate their emotions when things get heated. This means that they won’t fall into the impulsive trap of asserting their ego or making people feel intimidated or unseen in their presence. 

17. Have a compelling story to tell 

People with charisma know how to share their life stories in a captivating and memorable way. They have a personal narrative that helps them connect with people.

18. Have a good sense of humor 

People with charisma know how to laugh at themselves and can often find humor in everyday life. They’re self-aware but not self-conscious, confident without being arrogant, and they’re able to laugh at their own foibles.

19. A sense of urgency 

People with charisma want to achieve something in their lives and know the value of time. They’re able to see opportunities for growth that others may not be able to and are eager for change.

2o. Comfortable in their own skin 

Charismatic people don’t need validation from others or need attention. They’re secure enough in who they are and who they’ve become that they can put themselves out there without worrying about what anyone else thinks.

21. Be well-rounded 

When people with charisma have a passion, they’re well-rounded in their pursuits. They’re able to understand the importance of personal and professional development.

22. Be passionate 

People with charisma believe that they’re meant to be living a purposeful life. They’re constantly striving for personal happiness and being well-rounded helps them do that.

23. Have a positive outlook 

They aren’t afraid to dream big, and they’re able to see their goals as obtainable. They know that taking small steps toward their dreams can lead them to success.

24. Have an open mind 

People with charisma are good listeners who can understand and empathize with others. They’re not quick-witted or judgmental; instead, they’re willing and patient enough for conversations to go through the whole way.

25. Be genuine 

People with charisma can put their best foot forward and be genuine. They’ve learned that honesty is the best policy and they always strive to be the same person in public as they are in private.