Many people regard talking about their weight a very sensitive topic.
For some, their weight is more than just a number on a scale; it represents their relationship with their body and self-image.
This is why a guy will rarely come directly at you when he wants to tell you to lose weight. Instead, he’ll come indirectly, subtly hinting at it in different ways.
Maybe you’ve started noticing something off about the way he acts around you and you’re starting to wonder if it has something to do with your weight or not. This article will help you out.
Here are thirteen signs your boyfriend wants you to lose weight.
1. Subtle Hints About Healthier Lifestyles
Lately, you’ve noticed he often talks about healthier lifestyles. It might start as a casual chat about a documentary he watched on fitness or the benefits of clean eating.
Sometimes, it may seem like he’s just sharing information, but the frequency of these conversations might make you wonder.
It’s not uncommon for loved ones to discuss health and well-being. But is he genuinely concerned about overall health, or is there an underlying implication about your weight?
If he constantly emphasizes the importance of being thin or makes generalized statements about weight, it could be that he wants you to lose weight.
2. Comparing You With Others
One clear sign is the constant comparison with others, especially concerning physical appearance.
Maybe he often mentions how a particular celebrity has lost weight or how a mutual friend is looking more toned these days.
These might seem like harmless remarks initially, but continuous comparisons can chip away at one’s self-esteem.
Comparisons can be both explicit and implicit. For instance, he might not directly say it, but might often praise someone for their discipline or dedication to fitness.
Over time, these comments can leave you feeling inadequate or pressured to fit a certain mold.
[Related: 7 Obvious Signs He Doesn’t Like You]
3. Frequent Suggestions To Work Out Together
Exercise is an excellent way for couples to bond. But if he’s suddenly suggesting workout sessions together without prior interest, it might raise some eyebrows.
Perhaps he’s pushing for more rigorous activities or hints at attending more weight-focused classes.
It’s great to have a partner who motivates and supports you in leading a healthy lifestyle. But the line is crossed when the encouragement feels forced or is rooted in unsaid expectations.
4. Making Remarks About Clothing Sizes
You’ve noticed him commenting about clothing sizes. Maybe it’s a casual remark about how a certain dress size looks better or how some clothes seem more flattering for slimmer figures.
These comments can subtly indicate his perspective on weight.
Clothing can be a very personal choice, often tied to one’s self-image and confidence. Frequent remarks about sizes can make someone second-guess their choices and feel conscious about their appearance.
Such comments, no matter how trivial they might seem, can add unnecessary pressure.
5. Encouraging Specific Diets or Meal Plans
He’s now become an advocate for a particular diet or meal plan, emphasizing its benefits and suggesting you try it.
Whether it’s keto, paleo, or any other trending diet, it seems like he’s keen on you adopting it.
While it’s common for couples to explore healthier eating habits together, it becomes concerning when the emphasis is primarily on weight loss.
The intention behind suggesting such diets is crucial. It could be a genuine shared interest, but sometimes, it could hint at underlying expectations about body image.
6. Praising Weight Loss in Others Excessively
He’s been going on about someone’s recent weight loss, emphasizing how good they look or how much healthier they seem.
Although it’s natural to acknowledge positive changes in others, excessive praise, especially focused solely on weight loss, can be a subtle hint.
Continuous attention to someone’s weight loss can set a benchmark, inadvertently suggesting that shedding pounds equates to looking or feeling better.
7. Less Physical Affection or Intimacy
Changes in physical affection or intimacy can sometimes hint at underlying feelings. Maybe he’s less eager to cuddle, hold hands, or be intimate.
Various factors can influence intimacy levels, but a sudden change paired with other signs might indicate his feelings about weight.
Physical intimacy and affection are essential in romantic relationships. They foster closeness and strengthen the bond between partners.
A decline in these can lead to feelings of detachment or insecurity.
8. Always Opting For “Healthy” Date Options
Have you noticed that dinner dates have turned into salad-only affairs or that your usual movie night has transitioned into a brisk evening walk?
Such shifts, especially if one-sided, can hint at a desire for you to adopt a healthier lifestyle, which might indirectly relate to weight concerns.
While it’s fantastic to have health-focused dates now and then, it shouldn’t overshadow the core purpose, which is spending quality time together.
A sudden emphasis on only health-conscious activities can come across as forced or out of place.
[Read: 14 Signs Someone Is Mocking You]
9. Less Candid Photos of You on His Social Media
You’ve spotted a trend where he seems to post fewer candid photos of you, favoring posed or more “flattering” shots.
This shift could be innocent, but in conjunction with other signs, it might indicate a deeper concern about your weight.
Social media is a reflection of one’s life, interests, and sometimes, even preferences.
If you sense a pattern, talk about it. It’s essential for both partners to feel loved and accepted in all moments, posed or candid.
10. Avoiding Beach or Pool Dates
Avoiding such outings, where you’d wear swimsuits, can indicate some discomfort related to body image.
Swimming and beach outings are fun, relaxing, and a great way to bond.
If these activities suddenly drop off the radar, especially without a valid reason, it could signal some underlying feelings about appearance and body image.
Discussing it can help clear the air, ensuring that both partners feel comfortable and understood in the relationship.
[Also read: 10 Types Of Lovers You’ll See In Relationships]
11. Gifting Fitness-related Items Without Prior Interest
Out of the blue, he gifts you a fitness tracker, gym membership, or a new set of workout clothes.
These gifts can seem thoughtful, but if they come without any expressed interest from you, they might carry an underlying message.
Gifts are a way of showing love and care. However, the nature of these gifts, especially if unsolicited, can sometimes send unintended signals.
Fitness-related gifts, if not aligned with the recipient’s interests, can come across as pressuring or inconsiderate.
12. Sudden Interest in Cooking “Light” Meals
He’s taken a sudden interest in cooking, which is great! However, every dish seems to be a “light” version, focusing excessively on low calories or “diet-friendly” ingredients.
Such a consistent pattern can sometimes be his way of encouraging weight loss.
Eating healthily is essential, and it’s always great to explore new, nutritious recipes.
However, a consistent pattern of only “light” meals can feel a bit forced, especially if it’s not in line with previous dining habits.
13. He Tells You Directly
In some cases, he might come right out and tell you his feelings.
This direct approach, although appreciated for its honesty, can be hurtful, especially if not approached with sensitivity and understanding.
Openness in a relationship is essential, but it’s equally important to approach sensitive topics with care.
Telling someone they should lose weight, especially without a context of health concerns, can affect self-esteem and confidence.
The tone, words chosen, and intent play a massive role in how such messages are received.
What to do when your boyfriend wants you to lose weight?
First and foremost, have a conversation with your boyfriend. Make it clear how his actions or words make you feel, and try to understand his perspective as well.
Is it coming from a place of concern for your health or something else? Remember, in a relationship, your feelings are just as important as your partner’s.
Explain to him that changes related to your body should be for your comfort and health, not solely for another person’s preferences or expectations.
Additionally, evaluate how this situation is affecting your relationship and your self-esteem.
If your boyfriend’s request is causing you stress or impacting your mental health, it may be worth considering whether the relationship is healthy and respectful.
Is it normal to want your partner to lose weight?
It’s natural to care about your partner’s health and well-being, and weight can be a part of this.
However, it’s crucial to distinguish between concern for a partner’s health and enforcing personal aesthetic preferences onto them.
If the desire for a partner to lose weight stems from societal standards of beauty or a wish for them to look a certain way, it may be worth examining why these feelings are occurring.
It’s important to approach the topic sensitively and respectfully, considering how your words might impact your partner.
Encouraging a healthy lifestyle together, like exercising or cooking nutritious meals as a team, is much different than pressuring a partner to lose weight.
Should I be upset if my boyfriend wants me to lose weight?
Feeling upset in such a situation is completely understandable.
Your weight is a personal matter, and feeling like you’re being judged or critiqued by someone you love can be hurtful. It’s important to listen to your feelings and honor your emotions, as they are valid.
To address the issue, consider having a candid conversation with your boyfriend. Explain why his comments or behavior are upsetting to you and how they impact your self-esteem and the relationship.
Such a conversation can help to clear misunderstandings and set boundaries moving forward. It’s essential for both partners to feel loved and respected in a relationship.
My boyfriend wants me to lose weight, but I’m not fat. What should I do?
Clearly express that you are comfortable with your body and that his insistence is affecting your perception of the relationship and potentially your self-esteem.
Ask him to explain his perspective, and try to understand if his comments are stemming from a place of concern or from other motives.
After having this conversation, assess how you feel about the relationship. Do you feel respected and loved for who you are?
If his comments continue despite your conversation, consider whether this relationship is healthy and if it aligns with your personal values and self-respect.
- All photos from freepik.com